IF and WHEN

IF and WHEN were friends. Every week they met and had lunch. Their conversation usually centered on all the things they were going to achieve. They both had many dreams and they loved to talk about them.

This particular Saturday when they met, WHEN sensed that IF was not in a great mood. As usual they sat at the table reserved for them and ordered their lunch. Once they placed their order, WHEN questioned IF. "IF what is wrong with you? You don't seem your usual cheery self?"

IF looked at WHEN and replied, "I'm not sure, I just don't feel like I am making any progress. This last week I saw a course I wanted to take if only I had the time to take it."
WHEN knew exactly how IF felt. "Yeah," replied WHEN , "I too saw a course and I am going to register when I get enough money together." WHEN then said, "well what about that new job you were going to apply for. You were so excited about it last week, did you apply?"

IF responded, "If my computer didn't break down last week, I would have applied. But, my computer is not working, so I could not type my resume." "Don't worry about it IF , when you are ready another job will come through. I have been thinking about looking for another job also, but I will wait and when the weather gets nicer I will look then." WHEN then went on to tell IF about his week, hoping that it would cheer him up a bit.

The man at the next table couldn't help overhear WHEN and IF. They both were talking about when this and if that, finally he couldn't take it anymore. "Excuse me gentlemen," the man said. IF and WHEN both looked at the man and wondered what he wanted. The man continued, "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help hearing your conversation. I think I know how you could solve your problems."

IF smiled and thought, how could a complete stranger know how to solve all of their problems. If only he knew. When he realized the challenges they faced there was no way he could solve their problems! Curious, IF asked the gentleman, "How do you think you can solve our problems?"

The gentleman smiled and said, "

You only need listen to yourselves

. It reminds me of an old proverb: 'If and When were planted, and Nothing grew'."

IF and WHEN looked puzzled. The gentleman smiled and said, "Start counting how many times you use the words 'if' and 'when'. Rather than thinking 'if and when', start doing, take action, stop talking about 'if and when'."

IF and WHEN both looked surprised, and suddenly realized that what the gentleman had said was so true. Both of them were guilty of thinking, acting and living their life for the "ifs and whens". The gentleman left and IF and WHEN's conversation changed. They made a pact that when they met for lunch next week, there would be no "ifs and whens"; they would only talk about what they accomplished!

Time to Laugh

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth lett er of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
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Change our vision

There was a millionaire who was bothered by severe eye pain. He consulted so many physicians and was getting his treatment done. He did not stop consulting galaxy of medical experts; he consumed heavy loads of drugs and underwent hundreds of injections. But the ache persisted with great vigour than before.

At last a monk who has supposed to be an expert in treating such patients was called for by the millionaire. The monk understood his problem and said that for sometime he should concentrate only on greencolours and not to fall his eyes on any other colours.

The millionaire got together a group of painters and purchased barrels of green color and directed that every object his eye was likely to fall to be painted in green colour just as the monk had directed.

When the monk came to visit him after few days, the millionaire' s servants ran with buckets of green paints and poured on him since he was in red dress, lest their master not see any other colour and his eye ache would come back.

Hearing this monk laughed said "If only you had purchased a pair of green spectacles, worth just a few rupees, you could have saved these walls and trees and pots and all other articles and also could have saved a large share of his fortune. You cannot paintthe world green." Let us change our vision and the world will appear accordingly. It is foolish to shape the world, let us shape ourselves first.

Lets change our vision..!!

That's Intelligence

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his Customer,
"This is the dumbest kid in the world। Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a five rupee coin in one hand and two one rupee coins(1+1=2) in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"
The boy takes the two one rupee coins and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take two one rupee coins instead of five rupee coin?"

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because THE DAY I TAKE THE FIVE RUPEE COIN, THE GAME IS OVER.

Moral:

When you think the other person is dumb, you are making a
fool of yourself.

Know your Value....!

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a Rupee 500 note। In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this Rupee 500 note?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this note to one of you but first let me do this." He proceeded to crumple the note up. He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in the air. "Well," he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now all crumpled and dirty. "Now who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air. "My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson.

No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value। It was still worth Rupee 500/-. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. You are special. Don't ever forget it! Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams.

" VALUE HAS A VALUE ONLY IF ITS VALUE IS VALUED "

Why do some people get all the luck while others dont?

By Professor Richard Wiseman, University of Hertfordshire

A psychologist says he has discovered the answer: Ten years ago, I set out to examine luck. I wanted to know why some people are always in the right place at the right time, while others consistently experience ill fortune. I placed advertisements in national newspapers asking for people who felt consistently lucky or unlucky to contact me.

Hundreds of extraordinary men and women volunteered for my research and over the years, I have interviewed them, monitored their lives and had them take part in experiments. The results reveal that although these people have almost no insight into the causes of their luck, their thoughts and behavior are responsible for much of their good and bad fortune. Take the case of seemingly chance opportunities. Lucky people consistently encounter such opportunities, whereas unlucky people do not.

I carried out a simple experiment to discover whether this was due to differences in their ability to spot such opportunities. I gave both lucky and unlucky people a newspaper, and asked them to look through it and tell me how many photographs were inside. I had secretly placed a large message halfway through the n ewspaper saying: "Tell the experimenter you have seen this and win £250."This message took up half of the page and was written in type that was more than two inches high. It was staring everyone straight in the face, but the unlucky people tended to miss it and the lucky people tended to spot it.

Unlucky people are generally more tense than lucky people, and this anxiety disrupts their ability to notice the unexpected. As a result, they miss opportunities because they are too focused on looking for something else. They go to parties intent on finding their perfect partner and so miss opportunities to make good friends. They look through newspapers determined to find certain types of job advertisements and miss other types of jobs.Lucky people are more relaxed and open, and therefore see what is there rather than just what they are looking for.

My research eventually revealed that lucky people generate good fortune via four principles. They are skilled at creating and noticing chance opportunities, make lucky decisions by listening to their intuition, create self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations, and adopt a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good. Towards the end of the work, I wondered whether these principles could be used to create good luck.

I asked a group of volunteers to spend a month carrying out exercises designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person. Dramatic results. These exercises helped them spot chance opportunities, listen to their intuition, expect to be lucky, and be more resilient to bad luck. One month later, the volunteers returned and described what had happened. The results were dramatic: 80% of people were now happier, more satisfied with their lives and, perhaps most important of all, luckier. The lucky people had become even luckier and the unlucky had become lucky.

Finally, I had found the elusive "luck factor"Here are Professor Wiseman's four top tips for becoming lucky:

1) Listen to your gut instincts - they are normally right

2) Be open to new experiences and breaking your normal routine

3) Spend a few moments each day remembering things that went well

4) Visualize yourself being lucky before an important meeting or telephone call. Luck is very often a self- fulfilling prophecy

Have a Lucky day and work for it.

The allegory of the Frog...

Once upon a time there was a race of frogs. The goal was to reach the top of a high tower. Many people gathered to see and support them.

The race began.

In reality, the people probably didn’t believe that it was possible that the frogs reached the top of the tower, and all the phrases that one could here were of this kind : "What pain !!! They’ll never make it!"

The frogs began to resign, except for one who kept on climbing.

The people continued : "... What pain !!! They’ll never make it!..."

And the frogs admitted defeat, except for the frog who continued to insist.

At the end, all the frogs quit, except the one who, alone and with and enormous effort, reached the top of the tower. The others wanted to know how did he do it. One of them approached him to ask him how he had done it, to finish the race. And discovered that he was deaf.

Never listen to people who have the bad habit of being negative. Because they steal the best aspirations of your heart! Always remind yourself of the power of the words that we hear or read.

That’s why, you always have to think positive. Always be deaf to someone who tells you that you can’t and won’t achieve your goals or make come true your dreams.